l-d.

it's real. i can't see it, but i know it's there, because i can feel it.

we're real. i can see you, not face to face anyway, but in a window on my computer screen. your image gets blurry and grainy sometimes, your movements lag. i can see you, i can hear you, just like how you can see and hear me too. i can see and hear what's going on around you. and i wish i were really there, sitting opposite you in the cafe while you write your paper.

you're right in front of me, but i can't feel you, and that kinda hurts. that's what leaving a gaping hole right now - your presence and your company.

i want to be there, when you start grinning or breaking out laughing and your eyes light up, when you're deep in concentration as you do your readings, when you drive your car, when you're walking down the ave with your hands in your pockets, when you're having your grande caramel macchiato or italian soda with half and half (no whipped), or passionfruit bubble tea, when you wake up in the morning, or when you show up at my doorstep.

just not here.

closeness, that's what i crave right now.

Labels: love, musings, reminiscence

12:38 AM